What Can Women Take to Increase Their Sex Drive

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We've all been there: your partner wants to have sex at the end of the day, but you're just not in the mood. But what if that happens every night? Well, it's common for a woman's sex drive to ebb and flow, especially when there are so many factors that affect libido. If you've been experiencing a low sex drive and it hasn't bothered you — and hasn't had a negative impact on your relationship with your partner — then you have nothing to worry about, says OB-GYN Pari Ghodsi.

But if your decreased libido is mentally distressing or causing your relationship to suffer, it may be time to look into the cause of your low sex drive, officially referred to by medical professionals as hypoactive sexual desire disorder, to determine the root of the problem and work towards a solution.

The first step is identifying the cause of the problem, which can be tricky. "The reality is, for most women, low sexual desire is complex," says Dr. Megan Fleming, clinical psychologist and certified sex therapist. There are many causes of a decreased libido, including your hormone levels, the medications you're taking, your relationship with alcohol, your stress level and the state of your relationship with your partner.

Here's what you can do to address these problems and get your sex life —and your relationship — back on track.

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Take a Look at Your Prescriptions

Oftentimes, the answer to the cause of your low sex drive is sitting right there in the medicine cabinet. "There are some medications that can lead to a decrease in sexual desire," says Dr. Ghodsi. "For instance, certain antidepressants could be the culprit." The same goes for some types of birth control pills. Talk to your OB-GYN if you feel like there's a possibility your prescription meds could be the cause of the problem.

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Break a Sweat

Working out regularly helps improve self-esteem, and that confidence will follow you into the bedroom. "If you don't feel good about yourself, then you don't want to get naked," Dr. Ghodsi says. But if you're feeling sexy, it's more likely you'll want to share your body with your partner.

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Assess Your Pain

If you're experiencing pain during sex, it only makes sense that your libido will plummet. "It's hard to desire what is uncomfortable or painful," says Dr. Flemming, who mentions that many postmenopausal women experience vaginal dryness as the root of their discomfort. If using lubricant during sexual intercourse doesn't do the trick, then it may be time for a trip to the doctor. "The first stop should be the gynecologist, because you want to make sure that you're OK physically."

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Cut Back on Alcohol

Oftentimes, an increased consumption of alcohol can have negative effects on your sex life. Unwinding at the end of the day with a glass of wine is fairly harmless, but Dr. Ghodsi suggests taking note of how much you're drinking each week and cutting back to see if there's any correlation to your declined libido.

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Kick Back and Relax

Stress is a huge culprit of a depleted libido. When you're stretched thin, shifting your attention to multiple tasks at once, sex is probably the last thing on your mind. Putting aside time for yourself to do whatever it is that helps you unwind — whether that's going for a run, knitting a new scarf or binge-watching a few episodes of Grey's Anatomy — can help you recenter yourself.

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Schedule a Date Night

When was the last time you and your partner enjoyed a stress-free night together? It's easy to let life get in the way, which means its important to carve out time for your relationship. If you take your partner for granted, it can be easy for your sex drive to disappear. "People think the grass is greener on the side," says Dr. Flemming. "No. It's greener where you water it."

So, take the time to plan a date with your partner and see where the night goes. Some people don't like the idea of scheduling sex, but Dr. Flemming says if you're tight on time, you absolutely should. "If you plan out the time, you'll be looking forward to it," she says. The anticipation you'll feel leading up to it, plus your sexy thoughts of what you'd like to do together, will likely foster feelings of connection, flirtation and sexual desire.

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Try Something New

"People often fall into scripted sex, meaning same time, same place, same position," Dr. Flemming says. "And those couples say it doesn't feel like sex worth having." Spicing things up in the bedroom and adding novelty into your sex life can help shake that sense of monotony. She suggests trying something new, whether that's using a new position or incorporating sex toys — anything that will make you feel that anxious excitement of venturing into the unknown.

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Elissa Sanci Elissa Sanci is an Associate Staff Writer at the product review site Wirecutter.com and a former editorial assistant at Woman's Day.

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What Can Women Take to Increase Their Sex Drive

Source: https://www.womansday.com/relationships/sex-tips/g1169/increase-sex-drive/

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